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CONTROLLING OVER YOU PARTNER - 5 STEPS TO RESOLUTION.

''Where are you going?

Who are you with?

What time will you be back? ''.


Are you checking up on them constantly?


This clinginess often comes from a fear of abandonment.


You can become so focused on avoiding rejection that you become overly needy and demanding of the other people in your life.


And as you might guess, this can create a lot of havoc in relationships.


Abandonment fears often become a self-fulfilling prophecy either because you're choosing the person that's going to be more likely to abandon you or because, to avoid abandonment, you try to control the other person too much.


You don't allow them to be spontaneously enjoying their lives basically, and you're checking up too much or you're too needy and in a way that you are seeing the other person only in terms of your own needs and you are not seeing them as separate and what their needs may be.


This doesn't make your partner joyful and often causes resentment or drives them away.


This can end up becoming a bit of shitty loop that only serves to strengthen your fears.


The way it ends up playing out is that the person who is fearing abandonment starts to have jealous fantasies; where were you last night? What were you doing? Are you thinking of leaving me? Do you not love me anymore?


This pushes the other person away.